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“And I will do everything I can to protect you.” Tracing her tongue over Eve’s upper lip, Selene tightened her embrace. “I will do anything to keep you safe.”
Selene’s solemn words warmed her from the inside out, and Eve couldn’t help but think of that anonymous tip. It seemed impossible that the same woman who spoke so passionately would keep a secret of that magnitude. No way Selene had made that call. No way.
Selene brought their mouths together again in a passionate kiss. She pumped her hips faster, but kept her strokes shallow and gentle. The friction of their pelvises rubbing together was more than enough to bring Eve to the brink again. Selene slid a hand down Eve’s side, then curled beneath her bottom, tugging Eve’s leg over her own hip. Then she growled, “Mine,” and Eve spasmed around her and cried out in release once again.
Dropping her head onto Eve’s shoulder, Selene trembled and gasped like she’d forgotten how to breathe. Eve placed her hands on Selene’s back and stroked calming circles up and down her spine. “Yours,” Eve whispered. “Easy, darling. Take a deep breath.”
Selene’s body rose beneath Eve’s fingers as she inhaled deeply. Snaking her hands beneath Eve’s shoulders, she tugged Eve closer without withdrawing, still buried deep inside. Eve blinked in surprise when moisture fell upon her shoulder, craning her head to peer at Selene’s face. Tears streamed from Selene’s dark, searching eyes.
“What’s wrong?” Eve could feel that although Selene’s emotion was part joy, it had another level—sorrow, maybe. Or regret.
“Next Thursday night…” Selene lifted her head but didn’t quite meet Eve’s eyes. “I have to go out of town overnight. For a job. I should be back the next day, but…” Guilt tightened her features. “I can’t be with you on Thursday.”
A bitter stab of disappointment knocked the wind out of Eve. Shocked by the intensity of her reaction, she tried not to let it show. “I understand.” Selene winced and dropped her forehead on Eve’s shoulder again. Guiltily, Eve traced her fingertips down to the small of Selene’s sweat-slicked back. “It’s okay, Selene. Really. You have a life—and responsibilities—beyond me.”
“I wish you could come with me,” Selene mumbled. “But you can’t.” She drew back but seemed to have trouble meeting Eve’s eyes. “If I could cancel, I would. I swear. But I don’t have a choice.”
Eve forced a casual chuckle, taken aback by the self-loathing in Selene’s voice. Sure, it was unfortunate timing, but Selene had no reason to feel bad about fulfilling professional obligations. As a workaholic, Eve understood better than anyone. “Sweetheart, stop. It’s okay, really. It’s just one night.” She mustered a light tone even she didn’t really believe. “I’m a big girl. I’ll be just fine.”
Selene finally met her eyes. “I don’t want you to be alone that night.”
“Honestly, Selene—”
“No.” Every bit as forceful as she had been during their sexual play, Selene made it clear that the topic wasn’t up for discussion. “You can’t stay by yourself. If I was away and something happened to you, I’d never forgive myself.” Selene swallowed and looked away. “Never.”
“I won’t be alone. Jac has two detectives watching me at all times, remember?”
Selene scowled. “Even so, I’d feel better if you had someone inside with you. Or even if you stayed at a friend’s place.”
Eve touched Selene’s jaw, forcing her eyes back to Eve’s face. “Okay.”
“Maybe you can stay at Jac’s.”
That was the last thing Eve had expected Selene to suggest. “Jac? I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”
Looking as though she was struggling to swallow a mouthful of bad food, Selene said, “She has a gun. She can take care of you.”
“I have a gun, too.” Jac had stopped by that afternoon with a concealed weapons permit and a handgun. Eve hoped she’d never actually have to use it.
“Please, darling. For me.”
Eve’s belly flipped at the very real fear she sensed behind Selene’s concern. “I’ll see what Jac says.”
“Are you joking?” Selene kissed the tip of Eve’s nose. “She’s still in love with you. She’ll agree. Probably jump at the chance to have you all to herself.”
Face heating, Eve tried to interpret Selene’s tone. “Does that bother you?”
“No. I trust you.”
Eve tangled a hand in Selene’s dark hair and pulled her down for another kiss. “May I see you on Friday when you get home?”
“Just try and keep me away.”
*
Selene lay awake for hours after Eve fell asleep, struggling with guilt so intense she worried it might seep into Eve’s unconscious and darken her dreams. Their lovemaking earlier had left Selene shaken, humbled, and deeply, deeply ashamed. She had lied to the woman she loved. Worse, she had done so while still buried deep inside Eve after the most intense sex she suspected either of them had ever had. In a moment when she felt more connected to a human being than she had ever imagined possible.
She was a piece of shit.
The worst part was that she had no choice. For two weeks she had tried and failed to come up with other options, anything to avoid betraying Eve’s trust. But the only way to be honest would be to tell Eve that she was a shape-shifter who transformed into something horrific once a month on the eve of the full moon. And that her solution to the problem of safety—her own as well as the rest of the city’s—was to get naked and have a call girl tie her to a steel table.
Yeah, right. That would not only end their relationship, but could possibly get Selene committed. Or worse.
Truth was, Selene wished she could tell Eve and have her accept the truth. Eliminating the need for secrecy would only cement their already-strong relationship. Better than that, if Selene could tell Eve what she was, maybe they could use her ability to hunt down the Golden Gate Park killer. Selene had tools at her disposal that all the police investigations and forensic science in the world couldn’t replicate. With the freedom to take advantage of her true nature, Selene could protect Eve properly.
Unfortunately Selene was a coward. No matter how intense their connection was, she just couldn’t believe that Eve could handle the truth and accept her for what she was. Nobody else had, so why would a woman she’d known for a month—a woman of science—be any different?
She exhaled and put a hand on her stomach. She didn’t want to throw up, but it was taking everything she had to keep her dinner down. Eve was her mate, the undeniable nucleus of her universe, and Selene’s entire being burned with the need to protect what was hers. Knowing that Jac would have to do it instead, even for one night, was excruciating. She trusted Eve totally, but she hated the idea that Jac would take the opportunity to point out that Selene wasn’t good enough. Again.
Particularly because Jac had a point.
Eve whimpered in her sleep, stirring uneasily beneath the comforter. With effort Selene quieted her thoughts and turned on her side to pull Eve into a warm embrace. Immediately Eve calmed down. Whether her troubled dreams stemmed from the threat to her life or Selene’s own tortured thoughts, Selene didn’t know. What she did know was that she needed to figure out how they could possibly have a real relationship without Selene needing to lie every month.
Something had to give. Lying wasn’t a long-term strategy—it was a weak, cowardly way to buy some time. At some point, she would be forced to put their relationship to the test, to see if Eve truly was the one for her.
But not this month. Not yet.
Chapter Nineteen
Selene was right—when Eve explained to Jac that she was going out of town and didn’t want Eve to be alone, Jac couldn’t have looked more pleased about being designated her bodyguard for the night. So pleased, in fact, that it took every bit of Eve’s willpower to shove down the irritation she felt at Jac’s failure to hide her smug glee. But she did, because she was glad for Jac’s company. She didn’t want to spend the night in her apartment wondering
if the Golden Gate Park killer was lurking in the shadows.
When Jac mentioned cooking her dinner, Eve knew she would have to be on guard. Cooking was a wooing tactic for Jac, probably used successfully on far more women than Eve wanted to imagine. It had certainly worked on her, once upon a time. After turning down Jac’s last dinner invitation, Eve knew that Jac saw this evening as a second chance.
Jac said dinner was at five thirty, which meant she’d decided to leave work early to prepare their meal. She didn’t doubt that Jac wanted to make sure they were together well before dark, but she suspected that Jac was also just plain excited about finally getting Eve over to her place again. Still, Eve wouldn’t complain about the early meal. She didn’t particularly want to be out late anyway. Tonight was the full moon, and though Eve wasn’t superstitious, she recognized that the lunar cycle sometimes played into the patterns of psychopaths. The first murder had been committed the night of the previous full moon.
Eve left the lab early and was at Jac’s door ten minutes before she was due. She intended to spend the night discussing the case, so along with a bottle of wine, she carried a stack of forensic reports. Poring over case files would be the best use of their time together and would keep things professional, which was exactly where Eve wanted their relationship to stay.
Jac answered the door wearing an apron and a brilliant smile. “Hey. Fajitas will be ready in about five minutes.”
“Great.” Awkwardly, Eve offered her the bottle cradled against her side. Bringing wine had seemed like the thing to do until the moment she smelled Jac’s cologne and saw that Jac was wearing the purple shirt that had always turned Eve on when they were together. Apparently Jac had decided to be blatant about being in full seduction mode. Alcohol really didn’t need to be introduced into the mix, but it was a bit late for that now. “I brought the forensic reports on our two victims. I figured we’d comb through them to see what we’ve missed.”
Jac ushered Eve inside. “Of course. But let’s eat first, have a glass of wine. Unwind a little.” She looked Eve up and down, then kissed her cheek. “You look lovely.”
Eve stiffened. “This isn’t a date, Jac.”
“I know that.” Glancing at the bottle’s label, Jac whistled. “My favorite.”
“It’s a thank-you for giving up your evening to babysit me.” Eve followed Jac to the kitchen. She stood at the counter as Jac set the wine down, then checked her sizzling skillet of peppers and onions. “I hate knowing I messed up your plans.”
Jac shook her head. “No plans. There’s no place I’d rather be. And no one I’d rather be with.”
Sometimes Jac was wholly exasperating. Nine months ago Eve would have taken this about-face differently. Not that she would have necessarily forgiven Jac, because her betrayal had cut so deep, but at least then it would have vindicated her belief that they really had been in love. It would have proved that she hadn’t been crazy to believe their relationship was working right up until the moment she discovered Jac in bed with another woman. But coming as it did now, after Selene had entered the picture, Eve just felt like Jac was desperate to reclaim something Selene had rightfully won. And that made her angry.
All she could do was keep things friendly and courteous, and dissuade Jac from crossing the line Eve had clearly asked her to maintain. “Smells delicious.”
“I haven’t made them in a while.” Jac shrugged as she stirred. “I’ve missed having my most appreciative audience around.”
Eve forced a noncommittal hum, picking up a case file and flipping it open. “You know, I’ve been thinking about the lack of hair and fiber evidence at the scenes. What if—”
Jac raised her wooden spoon into the air. “I mean it. No talking shop until after dinner. Then you can knock yourself out.”
“Fine.” Eve tossed the file on the counter and sighed. Then she walked to the bottle of wine and snatched it up. “Where’s your corkscrew?”
“Drawer next to the sink.”
Eve found it and removed the cork from the bottle, filling two wineglasses halfway. She set one next to Jac, then stepped away, out of reach. Leaning against the door frame, she took a sip and watched Jac finish her masterpiece. Her fajitas really were the stuff of legend. In the past, Eve had considered them an aphrodisiac, and Jac knew it.
“So how are things with Selene?” Mouth frozen in insincere cheer, Jac managed to keep her voice light. “Still head over heels?”
“Don’t,” Eve murmured. “Please.”
“What?” Jac tried to sound innocent, but Eve knew better. “I’m just trying to make conversation. Be friendly.” She didn’t meet Eve’s eyes as she poured the vegetables onto a platter. “You ask her about that anonymous phone call yet?”
“She doesn’t know anything, Jac.”
“Is that what she said?”
Eve took another sip of wine. Truthfully, she had no idea why she hadn’t questioned Selene. She’d been ready to do so the night of their intensely passionate lovemaking, but every time Selene touched her, Eve lost all desire to rock the boat. Partially because she couldn’t bear the thought of finding out that Selene had been keeping secrets, but also because her gut told her that Selene would never betray her. She had all but given up on her gut after Jac and hated to imagine it might fail her again.
There was no way to make Jac understand without sounding naïve. “Jac—”
“I’m just asking. Did she tell you she didn’t know anything?”
Coming over tonight had probably been a mistake. But walking out and going home—or even to a hotel—wasn’t particularly appealing. And it would mean breaking her promise to Selene. Eve had sworn she would stay with Jac until Selene returned, no matter how awkward the situation might be. “She didn’t have to. Believe me, if Selene knew anything that might help us catch the guy, she’d tell me. I know she would.”
“Because she loves you?” Eve could hear the resentment in Jac’s tone.
“Yes,” Eve said simply. “Think what you will about Selene, but our feelings for one another are real. I don’t know how to explain it to you. It’s surprised me as much as anyone. But there it is. You have to trust me.”
“It isn’t you I don’t trust.”
“I know.” Eve didn’t bother to disguise her irritation, hopeful that Jac would back down if she sensed that her show of jealousy was about to ruin her perfectly choreographed evening. “Let’s drop it now, okay?”
“Okay.” Jac handed her the platter of fajitas and the bottle of wine. “Would you carry these to the table? I’ll be right behind you.”
“Sure.” Grateful to escape the confined space of the kitchen, Eve heard her stomach growl at the incredible sight of the meal Jac had prepared. For all her faults, Jac really knew how to express love through her food. And judging by the spread in front of her, Jac was full of love tonight.
Jac sat next to Eve at the table, gesturing at the tortilla holder in the center. “Don’t be shy. Dig in.”
“Thank you.” Eve spared Jac a genuine expression of gratitude as she filled her plate. “I’m starving.”
“Good, because I probably went a bit overboard. I hope you’re ready to take home some leftovers.”
“Always.”
Jac ate in silence, dragging her gaze over Eve’s body without visibly reacting. When she spoke a moment later, her voice came out husky. “You’re really looking good, Eve. I mean it. I’m guessing it’s being in love, but you look different than I’ve ever seen you. So…vibrant. Alive.”
“Ironic, considering I’m marked for death.” As much as she tried not to let her mind go there, fear had become Eve’s constant companion. Even more so when she wasn’t in Selene’s calming presence. But she didn’t doubt that Jac was right—being in love and sexually confident for the first time in her life, Eve felt like a new woman. Despite the terror this stalker had brought into her life, she felt freer than ever. She wasn’t surprised that Jac could see it, too. “Thank you, though. Besides the obses
sed-psychopath thing, I’m doing well.”
“Clearly.” Jac stared at her with an intensity that quickened Eve’s heartbeat. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you, you know. So as far as being marked for death, forget about it. This is some scary shit, for sure, but it’ll end well. And soon.”
“I know.” Eve managed to sound braver than she felt. At the moment they had an almost total lack of physical evidence, no solid witnesses, and not even a weak lead. Still, Jac would do everything possible to catch the guy. “Doesn’t stop me from worrying, though.”
“I get it. But just know that I can’t live without you. I refuse to. That bastard will not hurt you again.” Suddenly sober, Jac spoke in an intense tone that sent a shiver through Eve. Regardless of her feelings for Selene, Eve wasn’t immune to Jac’s desire. Cheater or no, Jac had once been the center of her world. Hearing genuine love in her voice still made Eve’s heart beat faster. “Hurting you was the worst thing I ever did. I’ll spend every day of my life atoning, if that’s what it takes.”
Eve swallowed a mouthful of food, then set down her fajita. “Jac—”
“Maybe it’s unfair of me to say these things now that you’re with Selene.” Jac took a large sip of wine, as though bolstering her courage. “I made some terrible mistakes, I know, but you can’t deny that we still have something special. Something that could be fixed, if you’d forgive me.”
“I do forgive you,” Eve said. “But forgiving you isn’t the same as wanting to be with you.”
Hurt flashed across Jac’s face, but she hid it quickly. “I deserve that. I know I do.” She took another long sip, then set down her glass with an easy chuckle. “But I can be persistent, and patient.”
“I wish you wouldn’t.”
Jac looked as though she was trying to decide whether to say something more, but simply cleared her throat. “Ready for dessert?”